STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION "Qpid" (f.k.a. "Q Love") #40274-194 Teleplay by Ira Steven Behr Directed by Cliff Bole THE WRITING CREDITS MAY NOT BE FINAL AND SHOULD NOT BE USED FOR PUBLICITY OR ADVERTISING PURPOSES WITHOUT FIRST CHECKING WITH THE TELEVISION LEGAL DEPARTMENT. Copyright 1991 Paramount Pictures Corporation. All Rights Reserved. This script is not for publication or reproduction. No one is authorized to dispose of same. If lost or destroyed, please notify the Script Department. FINAL DRAFT JANUARY 31, 1991 STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 2/5/91 - CAST STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION "Q Love" CAST PICARD Q RIKER VASH DATA SIR GUY GISBOURNE BEVERLY ELDERLY SERVANT TROI GEORDI WORF Non-Speaking VARIOUS ARCHEOLOGY COUNCIL MEMBERS COMPUTER VOICE A VULCAN COUNCIL MEMBER TROOP OF MEN-AT-ARMS Non-Speaking EXECUTIONER SUPERNUMERARIES CASTLE GUARDS SERVANTS MEMBERS OF THE COURT STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 2/5/91 - SETS STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION "Q Love" SETS INTERIORS EXTERIORS USS ENTERPRISE USS ENTERPRISE MAIN BRIDGE CAPTAIN'S READY ROOM SHERWOOD FOREST TEN FORWARD CORRIDOR NOTTINGHAM CASTLE PICARD'S QUARTERS VASH'S QUARTERS MEETING ROOM SHERWOOD FOREST A GLADE NOTTINGHAM CASTLE MAID MARIAN'S CHAMBERS STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - PRONUNCIATION STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION "Q Love" PRONUNCIATION GUIDE clavicular klaw-VICK-you-lahr STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - TEASER 1. STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION "Q Love" TEASER FADE IN: 1 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL) The ship orbits a small, orange hued planet. PICARD (V.O.) Captain's Log, stardate 44741.9. We have arrived at Tagus Three where the Enterprise is to serve as host of the Federation Archeology Council's annual symposium. 2 INT. READY ROOM PICARD, intensely studying his monitor screen. PICARD (V.O.) I look forward to giving tomorrow's keynote address with great anticipation. The DOOR CHIME SOUNDS. PICARD Come. TROI ENTERS. Picard barely glances up from the monitor. Troi smiles at Picard's preoccupation. TROI I thought you'd want to know, Captain, the Council members have all been beamed aboard and assigned quarters. PICARD Excellent. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/1/91 - TEASER 2. 2 CONTINUED: TROI (a hint) It really is quite late, Captain. Picard motions her over to the monitor. PICARD Tell me, Counselor, in regard to my lecture, which do you suppose would provide greater clarity? A chronological structure, or a division of each excavation's findings into various sociological, religious, and environmental sub-groupings? TROI I thought you had already decided on a chronological structure. PICARD (nodding; but not quite convinced) Still, there is something to be said for a more scientific approach. TROI Captain, may I make a suggestion? PICARD By all means. Troi finally has the Captain's complete attention. TROI Relax! You've written a brilliant speech. PICARD It needs to be. Tomorrow I'll be addressing some of the greatest scientific minds in the Federation. Switzer, Klarc-Tarn-Droth, McFarland. Giants in the field of Archeology. Next to them I'm nothing but an enthusiastic amateur. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - TEASER 3. 2 CONTINUED: (2) TROI I doubt they think of you as an amateur... not when it comes to the ruins of Tagus Three. PICARD (modestly) Well, I have done my homework... I've examined the findings of every archaeological expedition conducted on the planet's surface... TROI It's unfortunate the Taguans no longer allow outsiders to visit the ruins. PICARD (wistful) Indeed. Especially since we still know so little about their origin... He gestures toward the monitor. PICARD Hopefully, I've been able to construct some intriguing theories of my own. TROI I'm sure the council members will agree that you have. PICARD (smiling) Your support is appreciated, Deanna. Picard stands. PICARD Screen off. CU screen as it goes blank. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - TEASER 4. 3 INT. PICARD'S QUARTERS The door OPENS. Picard ENTERS looking somewhat fatigued. The first thing he notices -- is a Horga'hn sitting on his desk. Picard looks at it, curious... where the hell did this thing come from? Then... VASH (O.S.) Bring back any memories? Picard turns to see VASH stepping out of the shadows near the door. For a moment he's taken completely off-guard. PICARD Vash? How did you get in here? She smiles... and moves closer. VASH I came in through the window. Picard barely has the chance to regain his aplomb when she snakes an arm around him and they kiss. It's going to last awhile. FADE OUT. END OF TEASER STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT ONE 5. ACT ONE FADE IN: 4 INT. PICARD'S QUARTERS - MORNING Vash, wearing the same outfit from the night before, and Picard, in his dress uniform, sit at a table eating a brekfast of rolls and jam. Though there is still a warm afterglow from the evening's activities, Picard is slightly ill at ease about playing host to Vash aboard the Enterprise. PICARD I had no idea you were a member of the Archaeology Council. Vash only smiles. PICARD You are a member? (a beat) Aren't you. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/1/91 - ACT ONE 6. 4 CONTINUED: VASH (smiling) More or less. PICARD Why have you come to Tagus Three? VASH To see you, of course. PICARD Is that the only reason? VASH Isn't it enough? She's moves closer to him. It's an intimate moment. PICARD (smiling) I wish I could believe you? VASH (smiling right back) I'd be disappointed if you did. (a beat) I really have missed you, Jean-Luc. But before they can act on a mutual impulse the DOOR CHIMES. Picard waits until Vash steps away before answering. PICARD Come. BEVERLY strides in. BEVERLY I'm sorry I'm late... (noticing Vash) Oh, excuse me. I didn't know you had company. PICARD That's quite all right, Doctor. Beverly Crusher allow me to introduce Vash. A friend of mine with the Archeology Council. The two women exchange greetings. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 7. 4 CONTINUED: (2) BEVERLY (to Vash) I didn't mean to interrupt. The Captain and I often share morning tea. VASH Yes, Jean-Luc has told me all about you. BEVERLY Really? When was that? VASH On Risa. Where we met. Beverly is finding this all very interesting. BEVERLY I see. (to Picard) That must have been during your vacation last year. PICARD (giving nothing away) So it was. BEVERLY (to Vash) I'm surprised he never mentioned you. VASH So am I. She shoots Picard a look, but no explanation is forthcoming. VASH Are you busy, Doctor? BEVERLY Not at the moment. VASH I was wondering, I would love to see some more of this marvelous ship... STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 8. 4 CONTINUED: (3) BEVERLY I'd be delighted to show it to you. If that's alright with you, Jean-Luc. PICARD Of course. But he doesn't seem thrilled at the prospect. As Vash passes him on the way out... VASH (sotto voce) Don't worry, I promise to behave myself. Picard does not look reassured. 5 INT. TEN FORWARD The lounge is only lightly populated at the moment. Riker is seated alone having a drink. Beverly and Vash ENTER. BEVERLY And this is Ten Forward, where the Council's welcoming reception is to be held this afternoon. VASH (liking what she sees) I couldn't think of a better location. (a beat) Tell me, does Jean-Luc come here often? BEVERLY No, not often. VASH I didn't think so. BEVERLY The Captain is a very private man. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 9. 5 CONTINUED: VASH He certainly acted that way when we first met. (smiling) But I managed to loosen him up. Beverly would definitely like to learn more about this woman. BEVERLY Would you like something to drink? VASH Please. Beverly walks over to the bar. Vash checks out the view from the window as Riker APPROACHES. RIKER Eternity never looked so lovely. VASH Excuse me? RIKER I was referring to the view. Eternity never looked so lovely. Vash gives him a shrewd appraisal. VASH You must be Commander Riker. RIKER (surprised) I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage. VASH I didn't mean to interrupt. I believe you were about to tell me that my eyes are as mysterious as the stars. Riker is intrigued. How the hell did she know? RIKER (thinks he's figured it out) You're a Betazoid. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 10. 5 CONTINUED: (2) VASH Not at all. It's just that Jean-Luc does quite a good imitation of you. RIKER He does? Beverly comes back with the drinks. BEVERLY I see you two have met. RIKER Not exactly. BEVERLY Vash is a member of the Archeology Council. And a friend of the Captain. RIKER So I've gathered. BEVERLY They met during his visit to Risa. RIKER On Risa? (amused) That must have been a better vacation than he let on. VASH You mean he never mentioned me to you either? RIKER Believe me, if he had, I would have remembered. VASH (a bit frustrated) You'd think he'd have told someone about me. COMPUTER VOICE Doctor Crusher, please report to Sickbay. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 11. 5 CONTINUED: (3) BEVERLY On my way. (to Vash) I'm afraid I won't be able to finish up our tour. (a beat) Perhaps Commander Riker could fill in for me. RIKER It would be my pleasure. Beverly leaves. Riker and Vash head for the door. VASH So you're the one who asked Jean-Luc to buy the Horga'han. RIKER That was me. VASH Tell me Commander, do you collect sexual fertility symbols? RIKER I wouldn't call it a very large collection. And they're out the door. 6 INT. BRIDGE DATA and GEORDI at Science Station, WORF at Tactical. N.D.'s elsewhere. Riker and Vash EXIT the aft turbolift. RIKER And that brings us to the Main Bridge, the Command center of the Enterprise, and the end of our tour. He brings her over to the Science Station. RIKER Vash, I'd like you to meet Commander La Forge and Commander Data... STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 12. 6 CONTINUED: An exchange of greetings. Riker gestures over to Worf who looks on with disapproval. RIKER And this is Lieutenant Worf. (noticing Worf's scowl) Something wrong, Lieutenant? WORF Sir, I was not informed that Council Members had been granted bridge clearance. RIKER I think we can make an exception in this case, Mister Worf. Vash is the Captain's guest. Interested glances all around. Worf is somewhat at a loss for what to say. WORF (finally) Welcome aboard. Riker leads Vash over to the Command area. VASH Is this where Jean-Luc sits? RIKER (pointing it out) That's the big chair. To everyone's surprise she sits down in it. It provides a definite sense of power. VASH I can see where being a starship Captain does have its rewards. PICARD (V.O.) I'm glad you approve. All eyes turn to Picard who has just exited the Ready Room. Vash stands. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 13. 6 CONTINUED: (2) VASH Jean-Luc. Commander Riker was just showing me the bridge. Picard looks at Riker. RIKER Doctor Crusher was called to Sickbay. Picard nods. An awkward beat of silence. PICARD So, did you enjoy your tour? VASH Very much. PICARD Good. Another awkward moment. VASH I guess I'll head back to my room now and get ready for the reception. PICARD By all means. (a beat) Well, I suppose I'll see you then. VASH I look forward to it. She turns and makes the long walk back up the ramp to the turbolift. RIKER (watching her go) Fascinating woman. No comment, from Picard. 7 ANGLE ON Data and Geordi. Geordi has also watched Vash EXIT the bridge. As the turbolift doors close he breaks into a grin. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 14. 7 CONTINUED: DATA You find something humorous, Geordi? GEORDI Didn't you notice how ill-at-ease the Captain seemed around Vash? DATA Yes. However I see nothing amusing in his hostility toward her. GEORDI That wasn't hostility, Data. (off Data's look) He likes her. (a beat) A lot. Still smiling, Geordi turns back to the science monitor. A puzzled Data is left pondering the intricacies of human relationships. 8 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL) The ship maintains standard orbit. 9 INT. TEN FORWARD The reception. COUNCIL MEMBERS mingle with the crew. A rather informal time is being had by all. 10 NEW ANGLE Vash has cornered TROI over by a buffet table. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT ONE 15-15A. 10 CONTINUED: VASH I don't understand, I thought being ship's counselor meant the Captain confided in you. TROI He does. When he feels it's necessary. VASH And he never spoke to you about me? TROI Not that I can recall. VASH Not even a hint? TROI You must understand, the Captain is a very... TROI & VASH (together) Private man. VASH I know... She spots Picard who is deep in discussion with a Vulcan Council Member. VASH Will you excuse me? TROI Certainly. Vash walks off. 11 NEW ANGLE Vash passes by Worf, Geordi, Beverly and Data. WORF (still watching Vash) Nice legs. (off Geordi's look) For a human. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 16. 12 NEW ANGLE Picard and the Vulcan. PICARD I agree, the Vulcan excavations on Tagus Three were extensive. Unfortunately, they were confined to the northeastern part of the city. Vash appears at his elbow. VASH Jean-Luc, we need to talk. One look and Picard knows she means it. PICARD (to the Vulcan) Pardon me. He and Vash move to a private spot. PICARD The reception seems to be a success. VASH Forget the reception for a moment. How come you've never mentioned me to your friends? PICARD What would you have me tell them? VASH Maybe that we met, for one thing. That we had an adventure together. Some fun... PICARD I'm afraid that wasn't possible. VASH Why not? PICARD It would have been... inappropriate. VASH I wasn't expecting you to go into any intimate details. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT ONE 17. 12 CONTINUED: PICARD A Captain does not share his personal feelings with his crew. VASH Is that a Starfleet regulation? Or did you make that one up yourself? PICARD I'm sorry if you're upset. VASH And I'm sorry if my being here embarrasses you. And with that she turns and walks away. HOLD ON a perplexed Captain Picard. 13 INT. MAIN BRIDGE Riker at command. N.D.'s at Conn and Ops. Picard ENTERS from the forward turbolift. RIKER How was the reception? PICARD (brusque) Splendid. He EXITS into the Ready Room. 14 INT. READY ROOM Picard ENTERS and stops as he SEES -- 15 Q seated at his desk dressed in a Starfleet uniform. Q Jean-Luc! How wonderful to see you again. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT ONE 18. 15 CONTINUED: ON PICARD'S REACTION... FADE OUT. END OF ACT ONE STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 19. ACT TWO FADE IN: 16 INT. READY ROOM - CONTINUOUS (OPTICAL) As before. Q Well don't just stand there, say something. Picard advances into the room. PICARD Get out of my chair. Q I was hoping for something more along the lines of "Welcome back, Q. It's a pleasure to see you again old friend." PICARD We are not friends. Q You wound me, mon Capitain. Q snaps his fingers and now it's Picard who sits at his desk and Q who stands before him. Q There, perhaps now your manners will show some improvement. PICARD What brings you here, Q? Have you been banished from the Continuum once again? Q Hardly. They're still apologizing to me for the last time. PICARD Then what is it you want? STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 20. 16 CONTINUED: Q Must I always have a reason to stop by. I was in the sector and... (Picard doesn't buy it) Alright. You force a confession from me. The truth is I have a debt to settle. PICARD A debt? Q To you, Picard. And it gnaws at me. It interferes with each day. PICARD I have no idea what you're talking about... Q Without your assistance at our last encounter, I never would have survived. I would have taken my own life but for you, Jean-Luc. PICARD We all make mistakes. Q Your good deed made possible my reinstatement into the continuum. And I resent owing you anything... so I'm here to pay up... what shall it be... tell me and I'll be gone... PICARD Just be gone. That will suffice nicely. Q No, it must be something... something... (searching) ...constructive. My new word for the day. PICARD Some other time, all right? Right now I have several things to attend to. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 21. 16 CONTINUED: (2) Q Yes, your speech. I've read it. I found it dull and pedantic. Much like yourself. (an idea) I could help you with it. PICARD No. Q You've never actually been to the ruins in Tagus Three, have you? PICARD They've been sealed off for over a century. Q How can you write about what you haven't seen? 16A ANGLE (OPTICAL) Q is suddenly wearing a safari suit... Q (brightening) I'll take you there! PICARD Impossible. That would mean breaking Taguan law. Q Must you always be so ethical? (thinking) I suppose we could travel back in time. You could see what Tagus was like two billion years ago. They really knew how to have fun in those days. PICARD I'm afraid my answer is still no. My lecture will have to stand on its own. Now, will you please leave my ship. Q Then you refuse my help? STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 22. 16A CONTINUED: (2) PICARD Completely. A beat as Q broods. Then finally... Q (mildly) You're simply impossible to find a gift for, Picard. And he's gone. PICARD (to Conn) Commander Riker, report to my Ready Room. Riker ENTERS. RIKER Yes, Captain? PICARD I've just been paid a visit by Q. RIKER Q? (concerned) Any idea what he's up to? PICARD He wants to do something nice for me. Riker REACTS. That definitely sounds like trouble. RIKER I'll alert the crew. OFF Picard's look of approval: 17 INT. CORRIDOR - MINUTES LATER Picard EXITS the turbolift. He heads down the Corridor on the way to meet with one of the Council Officials. At the hall he hesitates, turns left instead of right. 18 NEW ANGLE Picard HALTS at a doorway. RINGS the bell. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT TWO 23. 18 CONTINUED: VASH (V.O.) Who's there? PICARD It's me. VASH (V.O.) Who? PICARD Jean-Luc. The door slides open. Vash stands in the entrance. VASH Yes. PICARD May I come in? VASH What for? PICARD To talk. VASH I'm listening. PICARD If it's all the same to you I'd rather this discussion not take place in a public corridor. He slips past her. 19 INT. VASH'S QUARTERS The first thing Picard notices are various digging tools piled in a corner. He looks over at Vash. VASH I thought these were "private" quarters. Picard picks up a PADD off the table. 20 INSERT PADD A map of the ruins of Tagus. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT TWO 24. 21 BACK TO SCENE Picard places the Padd back on the table. PICARD And I thought I was the only reason you came to Tagus. VASH I never fooled you for a second. She moves closer to Picard. VASH Still, you are the most important reason. PICARD Am I? Vash steps away. VASH That's the trouble with being such a well known liar. Even when I tell the truth no one believes me. Picard refuses to be swayed. PICARD I'm afraid all this equipment will have to be confiscated. VASH Is that necessary? PICARD I could have you placed in the brig. VASH Why don't you? PICARD If the Taguans were to catch you down there... VASH You gave me the same warning about Sarathong Five. PICARD I remember. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 25-25A. 21 CONTINUED: VASH Well, it didn't stop me from going there. I brought back some very impressive artifacts, too. PICARD Which you no doubt sold for a nice profit. VASH (angry) It's what I do! PICARD Not while you're aboard my ship. I will not allow it. VASH Let's get one thing straight, Picard. I can not change who I am for you or anyone else. PICARD Nor can I change who I am. VASH (calmly) Then we have nothing more to say to each other. PICARD So it would seem. Picard leaves. Vash sits at the table. She's depressed and upset. 22 NEW ANGLE (OPTICAL) Q's head APPEARS from the bulkhead behind her. He's obviously overheard their discussion and found it fascinating. 23 INT. CORRIDOR As Troi, Geordi and Data walk down it... STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 26. 23 CONTINUED: GEORDI What do you think it is? DATA What do I think what is? GEORDI About her. That, you know, gets to the Captain. DATA Perhaps it is their common interest in archaeology. TROI I don't think so. DATA But Counselor, as an archaeologist, her company would certainly be intellectually stimulating to the Captain. GEORDI She's not just stimulating his intellect, Data... TROI It's really none of our business. They turn a corner and come face to face with... 23A Q (OPTICAL) Leaning against a wall. Wearing a Starfleet uniform again. Q You want to know about Picard and that woman? I'll tell you... We HEAR the SOUND of BIRDS CHIRPING in the air. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT TWO 27. 23A CONTINUED: Q (sneering) It's love. He DISAPPEARS. 24 INT. PICARD'S QUARTERS (OPTICAL) Picard ENTERS, disgruntled. He goes into his bedroom, which is dark. As he enters, he sees a figure under the covers in his bed. A slight smile creeps to his lips. He moves to the bed, pulls back the covers to reveal Q. Q Sleeping alone, Picard? PICARD I'm in no mood for your foolishness, Q. Q I thought there was something different about you. You seemed tense, preoccupied. Somewhat... smaller. (a beat) At first I thought it was that horrible lecture of yours. But I was mistaken. PICARD Whatever game you want to play will have to wait until tomorrow. Picard gets into bed but Q refuses to be ignored. Q I had such hopes for you, Jean-Luc. I thought you were a bit more evolved than the rest of your species. But now I realize you're as weak as all the others. (a beat) Still, it pains me to see the great Picard brought down by a woman. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 28. 24 CONTINUED: Picard, tries not to feign disinterest. PICARD What woman? Q Don't play coy with me Captain. I witnessed your little spat with Vash. Nor will I soon forget that look of misery on your face. The pain. The anguish. If I didn't know better I would have thought you were already married. PICARD You really must be bored, Q. You're letting your imagination run away with you. Q This human emotion of Love is a dangerous thing, Picard. You are obviously ill equipped to handle it. She's found a vulnerability in you... a vulnerability that I've wanted to find for years. If I had known this sooner, I would have arrived as a female. Mark my words, Jean-Luc, this is your Achilles heel.. PICARD Believe what you wish. Q You deny you care for this woman? Picard doesn't answer. Q Believe me, Picard, I'd be doing you a big favor if I simply turned her into a Klabnian eel. PICARD (very seriously) Stay away from her, Q. Q I only want to help... my debt to you... STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT TWO 28A. 24 CONTINUED: (2) PICARD (interrupting) ... is hereby nullified. I don't want your help... your advice... your favors... or for that matter -- you. Can you understand that once and for all? Q You would have me stand idly by while she leads you to your destruction? PICARD Yes! Q As you wish. And once again, he's gone. A concerned Picard is left wondering what Q meant by that last remark. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/8/91 - ACT TWO 29. 25 INT. MEETING ROOM - NEXT MORNING As Picard and Riker ENTER... RIKER Knock 'em dead, Captain. Picard nods and moves toward the podium; Riker toward the audience. 26 ANOTHER ANGLE All seats are filled in anticipation of Picard's lecture. Vash sits among the Council Members. Our regular crew members are present as well. 26A ANGLE - PICARD As he steps up to the podium. He's waited for this moment a long time. PICARD Ladies and gentlemen, members of the Archeology Council. Welcome. It is the mystery of Tagus Three that brings us together today... a mystery that has invited more argument and deduction than the best Sherlock Holmes or Dixon Hill tale. Well, if you'll excuse the conceit, you're about to hear my own detective story. 26B thru OMITTED 26C 26D ANGLE - TROI AND BEVERLY (OPTICAL) Suddenly, a hunting cap, with feather, appears on Beverly's head. As Troi attempts to point this phenomenon out to Beverly, a similar cap appears on her own head. They stare at each other in disbelief. PICARD (V.O.) For several years, I have been trying to unravel the secrets of Tagus Three. Needless to say, I have not succeeded. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/8/91 - ACT TWO 30. 26E ANGLE - PICARD Still unaware that anything is amiss. PICARD However, I have, I believe, turned up some new information, that if nothing else, raises a whole new set of mysteries that I hope we can discuss during our time togther. 26F ANGLE - RIKER AND GEORDI (OPTICAL) Riker reacts to the quarterstaff that appears in his hand; Geordi to the mandolin that appears in his. PICARD (V.O.) There have been nine hundred and forty-seven known Archaeological excavations conducted on the planet's surface. 26G ANGLE - DATA (OPTICAL) who finds himself wearing a cowl... and holding a leg of lamb. PICARD (V.O.) Out of that number some seventy-four are generally considered to have revealed findings of major importance. 26HA ANGLE - WORF Astounded by the chaperone which has appeared on his shoulders. PICARD (V.O.) The earliest took place some twenty-two thousand years ago. 26H ANGLE - PICARD (OPTICAL) who along with the rest of the theater audience is beginning to realize that something peculiar is going on. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/8/91 - ACT TWO 30A. 26H CONTINUED: PICARD The last was completed within the last four hundred years. Suddenly he's dressed in a jerkin and cap of familiar Lincoln green. The audience REACTS. So does Picard. Then, as a yeoman's bow appears in his hand... PICARD What the hell... ! He VANISHES. 27 EXT. FOREST - DAY - (OPTICAL) Picard, Riker, Geordi, Data, Worf, Beverly and Troi all APPEAR at the same time... all dressed in period costume. Beverly and Troi wear men's clothing. Beverly also carries a sword; Troi a longbow and arrows. Data is bald except for a soupbowl fringe plastered to his forehead. Riker wears a yellow jerkin and carries his quarterstaff. Worf is dressed like a dandy and Geordi still holds his madolin. As they all react... PICARD (raging) Q! FADE OUT. END OF ACT TWO STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT THREE 31. ACT THREE FADE IN: 28 EXT. FOREST - DAY As our heroes survey the scenery around them... TROI Is this Tagus Three? PICARD I doubt there are many oak trees on Tagus. No, my guess is this is supposed to be Earth. (off reactions) Sometime around the twelfth century. And this is England, Sherwood Forest to be precise. Or at least Q's re-creation of it. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 32. 28 CONTINUED: RIKER That explains these costumes. PICARD Exactly, Number One. (a beat) Or should I say, John Little. Riker studies Picard to see if he's serious. BEVERLY If he's Little John, that would make you... PICARD I know. Robin Hood. A beat as this sinks in. WORF Sir, I protest. I am not a merry man. DATA On the contrary, Lieutenant Worf, your clothing identifies you with the character of Will Scarlett. Just as Geordi's Mandolin suggests he is Alan-A-Dale. RIKER And you, Mister Data, bear a striking resemblance to one Friar Tuck. Data examines his stomach. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/1/91 - ACT THREE 33-33A. 28 CONTINUED: (2) WORF I will not play the fool for Q's amusement. He takes off his cap, looks at it in disgust, and slams it on the ground. PICARD You're quite right, Worf. (loudly) Do you hear that Q? You may as well return us to our ship immediately. They react to a horse's shrill whinny and turn to see... STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 34. 29 thru OMITTED 30 30A SIR GUY OF GISBOURNE Mounted on a sleek charger, sword drawn. SIR GUY I have you at last, Robin Hood. As he charges at Picard... 30B NEW ANGLE Worf draws his own sword to defend his Captain... 30C ANOTHER ANGLE Sir Guy rides past Worf, cutting him across the shoulder with his sword. Worf is ready to fight on, but... Suddenly an arrow slams into a tree next to Picard... 30D ANGLE - SEVEN MEN AT ARMS Coming over a nearby hill. Longbows at the ready. 30E RESUME ANGLE - PICARD AND WORF Three more arrows strike trees around them. Picard sees there's only one hope to escape. PICARD Quick. Into the forest. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 34A. 31 thru OMITTED 31B 31C ANGLE - WORF prepares to cover their retreat. 31D ANGLE - PICARD Hanging back as the others disappear into the trees. PICARD Mister Worf. That's an order. Worf follows Picard into the forest. 31E OMITTED 31F NEW ANGLE A furious Sir Guy turns to his men, who search the underbrush. SIR GUY Enough, you fools. We'll never find them in the greenwood. 32 INT. FOREST - A GLADE - DAY Picard and his crew are resting. He approaches Worf who is being tended to by Beverly (sans tricorder.) BEVERLY (applying a makeshift bandage) I've managed to stop the bleeding. 33 NEW ANGLE (OPTICAL) Q appears on horseback. He's garbed in the cloak and livery of the High Sheriff of Nottingham. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 35. 33 CONTINUED: An angry Picard approaches Q. PICARD It's about time you showed up, Q. Q I'd prefer it if you addressed me as His Honor the High Sheriff of Nottingham. PICARD We will not share in this pointless fantasy of yours. Q dismounts. Q Fine. Wait here and do nothing. By mid-day tomorrow, you'll all be safely back aboard your ship. But you will have to accept the consequences of your inaction. PICARD What consequences? Q What's the one thing Robin Hood is famous for? STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 36. 33 CONTINUED: (2) A beat. Nobody answers. Then... GEORDI Robbing from the rich to give to the poor? Q Besides that. DATA Are you referring to his rescue of Maid Marian from Nottingham Castle? Q Right you are, Data. Q looks over at Picard with glee. Q And it just so happens that Sir Guy of Gisbourne has decreed that Marian's head comes off tomorrow at noon. PICARD (grimly) Vash. Q smiles. He's enjoying himself thoroughly. Q The choice is yours my dear, Robin. You can either take your ease here within the sylvan glade or risk your life to save a woman you care nothing about. PICARD My feelings toward Vash are irrelevant. I'd attempt to save any innocent life, as you well know. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 37. 33 CONTINUED: (3) Q But what of your merry men? Are you willing to put them in jeopardy as well? Is Vash's life worth losing hers or his or even his... ? (the last being Worf) Though I admit he would make a perfect throw rug at Nottingham Castle. PICARD Q, I ask you to end this now, before anyone else gets hurt. Q swings up onto the horse. Q Impossible. You see, I've given this fantasy as you call it, a life of its own. I don't know how things will turn out anymore than you do. (a beat) But of one thing I am certain. If you dare set foot in Nottingham Castle, blood will be spilled. He, and the horse vanish. 34 EXT. NOTTINGHAM CASTLE - DAY - (OPTICAL) Establishing. 35 INT. MAID MARIAN'S CHAMBERS - DAY A small, stark room in the tower; minimal furniture to include a wooden bench. Vash, dressed in Marian's virginal white, paces the floor. She's watched by an ELDERLY SERVANT. SERVANT You'll wear yourself out with all that pacing, M'lady. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 1/31/91 - ACT THREE 38. 35 CONTINUED: VASH I told you to stop calling me that. My name's Vash. SERVANT My poor lamb, it's a brain sickness you've got for sure. Can't I get you something to ease your suffering? VASH I could use a drink. SERVANT It wasn't spirits I was thinking of M'lady. She picks up a wooden box. SERVANT I have here some nice fresh leeches to drain the fever. Vash points to the door. VASH Out. Get out. The servant rushes to the door, but before she can get there it opens and Sir Guy ENTERS. SERVANT Oh, her mind's in an awful turmoil, Sir Guy. Sir Guy stares at Vash with undisguised desire. VASH Who the hell are you? SERVANT M'Lady, everyone in Nottingham knows, Sir Guy of Gisbourne. VASH Sir Guy of what? Her Servant rolls her eyes towards heaven, and shaking her head hurries out of the room. Sir Guy closes the door behind her. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 38A. 35 CONTINUED: (2) SIR GUY Do not mock me, Lady Marian. I'm prepared to offer you one final chance to change your mind. He grabs hold of her. SIR GUY Will you marry me? Vash pulls away and slaps him across the face. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 39. 35 CONTINUED: (3) SIR GUY (coldly) I see. Then the execution will proceed as scheduled. Sir Guy turns to leave. VASH What execution? SIR GUY (turning back) I warn you Marian, this pathetic attempt at feigning madness will not save your life. VASH (shocked) You mean I'm the one getting executed? Though Vash is at a loss to explain how she came to be in this current predicament, a lifetime of adventure has honed her survival instincts to a razor's edge. VASH Sir Guy, wait? Can't we talk this over? (a beat) I admit, I haven't been myself lately. (flashing her best smile) Perhaps we've both been acting a bit hasty. She sits down on the bench. Pats the space next to her. VASH Please. Sir Guy smiles. Delighted. 36 EXT. SHERWOOD FOREST DAY We hear bad mandolin playing in the background as Troi pulls back on a bow and lets fly an arrow. We HEAR the THWACK of impact. CAMERA PANS OVER to the tree that was her intended target. There's no sign of the arrow. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT THREE 39A. 36 CONTINUED: PAN OVER a few feet to the right. Data is standing with an arrow in his chest. Troi hurries over. TROI Data, are you alright? A beat, as Data checks his systems. DATA The arrow impacted just above my sixth intercostal support, penetrating my secondary subprocessor. Data moves his arm up and down and in and out. DATA (continuing) Fortunately, none of my biofunctions seem impaired. Data pulls the arrow out of his body. He offers it to Troi who is much relieved. DATA Do not get discouraged. I believe your aim is improving. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 40. 36A NEW ANGLE Beverly is checking Worf's wound in the background as Geordi sits on a log strumming the mandolin... it sounds like fingernails on a blackboard. Worf gets up, crosses to Geordi, and takes the mandolin out of his hands. He walks over, and smashes it against a tree. Hands the neck back to Geordi. WORF Sorry. 37 NEW ANGLE A relieved grin from Riker as he watches Picard buckle on his sword. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT THREE 41. 37 CONTINUED: RIKER It's about time we got out of here, sir. PICARD Not we Commander. You and the others are to wait here until I return. RIKER You're not planning to go after her alone, are you? The others gather around. PICARD This is not a mission. It's personal, between Q and myself. I don't want any of you involved. RIKER But Captain... PICARD You have your orders, Commander. I expect you to follow them. With a final glance at his crew, Picard heads off towards Nottingham. On Riker's worried look we... FADE OUT. END OF ACT THREE STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT FOUR 42. ACT FOUR FADE IN: 38 EXT. COURTYARD INSIDE WALLS OF CASTLE - NIGHT Cold, imposing, and lit by flickering torches. We see a limited section of the yard... Heraldic banners hang from the walls. A circular staircase rises to the tower. Only a few servants are visible as a haughty Q (still dressed as the High Sheriff) surveys his domain with smug satisfaction. Nearby is an EXECUTIONER. Off to the side, a TINKER, with his back to us, repairs the chains on a pair of shackles. The massively built Executioner is busy sharpening the blade of his broad axe against a foot powered grindstone. He pauses to inspect his work. Q, passing by, barely taps the edge of the blade with his index finger. Q A touch sharper, shall we? The Executioner starts up the grindstone. Q suddenly halts in confusion as he discovers a surprising sight before him. 39 NEW ANGLE Vash and Sir Guy, looking surprisingly chummy as they approach from another part of the courtyard. She carries a bouquet of fresh-picked flowers. Sir Guy holds up a pomegranate. Vash smiles and demurely nibbles it. A suspicious Q approaches them. Q Such benevolence, Sir Guy, allowing the condemned prisoner fresh air. SIR GUY You're mistaken, Sheriff. Maid Marian has consented to be my wife. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT FOUR 43. 39 CONTINUED: Q looks at Vash in disbelief. Q But that's impossible? Vash motions to a servant who approaches with a tray and two goblets of wine. VASH (innocently) Not at all. Though I admit a maiden seldom has the opportunity to win herself such a noble husband. She takes a goblet from the tray and hands it to Sir Guy... SIR GUY A toast to the most beautiful bride-to-be in all of England. He goes to drink. Q Hold there, Sir Guy. He knocks the goblet to the ground. SIR GUY Have you taken leave of your senses? Q It could be poisoned. Some foul scheme of Robin Hood. She's in league with him still, I'll warrant. VASH Robin Hood? A beat as Vash absorbs this rather bizarre accusation. She has no choice but to bluff her way through it. VASH Oh, Robin Hood... that was over long ago. Q Why, all of Nottingham knows you're in love with him. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT FOUR 44. 39 CONTINUED: (2) VASH That's a lie. (to Sir Guy) He... bewitched me. Put me under some evil spell. Sir Guy gives her hand an encouraging pat. SIR GUY Just as I suspected. (to Q) You can add sorcery to the list of charges against that rogue. Q But Sir Guy, if anyone has been bewitched it's you. Sir Guy stands. His hand is placed firmly on the hilt of his sword. SIR GUY Silence. Any further impudence and it'll be your head on the chopping block. (a beat) Guards, escort the Lady Marian to her chamber. VASH (standing) But I'd much rather stay with you. SIR GUY Of course you would, my child. But I have important business to discuss with the Sheriff. (a beat; then dripping with implication) And you must prepare for your wedding. VASH I count the hours. She kisses him. She allows herself to be led away, but not before her eyes flash him the promise of future delights. Sir Guy and Q watch her depart. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT FOUR 44A. 39 CONTINUED: (3) SIR GUY Lovely creature. Q (with grudging admiration) She is intriguing. Q is determined not to allow his well-laid scheme go astray. Q Sir Guy, perhaps it would be wise to keep this wedding a secret for now. SIR GUY What are you babbling about? Q You still hope to capture Robin Hood, don't you? SIR GUY I live for the moment. Q (thinking of Picard) Well, if he were to hear that Marian's life was no longer in danger, there would be no need for him to come to Nottingham to rescue her. Sir Guy slaps Q on the back. SIR GUY By heavens, you're right. No word of my wedding shall leave these walls. (MORE) STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT FOUR 45. 39 CONTINUED: (4) SIR GUY (Cont'd) (a beat) What better way to celebrate a marriage than with an execution. Sir Guy and Q share a chuckle, then go their separate ways. Q (musing) This could be fun. 40 NEW ANGLE Q crosses by the Tinker hammering at a chain. The Tinker looks up once Q has passed him by, REVEALING himself to be Picard in disguise. 41 INT. MAID MARIAN'S CHAMBER - NIGHT Vash paces around the room. Suddenly she stops. Listening to what could be a faint rustling. The noise ceases. Vash continues to pace. The rustling resumes, louder now. Again, Vash stops pacing. The sound, and now it's clearly the rustling of vines, is coming from outside her open window. She moves towards the embrasure, when SUDDENLY a hand APPEARS on the ledge. With a final GRUNT, Picard lifts himself through the window. Vash throws herself at him. VASH Jean-Luc. Am I glad to see you. She throws herself into his arms, and kisses him. VASH You would not believe what I've been through. One minute I'm on the Enterprise... the next thing I know I'm here in Nottingham. First, they're going to chop my head off... and now I'm supposed to marry someone named Sir Guy... and everyone insists on calling me Marian... STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT FOUR 45A. 41 CONTINUED: PICARD Yes, I know. VASH You do? But how... For the first time she notices his outfit. VASH You're Robin Hood? STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT FOUR 46. 41 CONTINUED: (2) PICARD My staff and I were brought here by an old adversary of mine named Q. I'll tell you the rest once we're safe. He leads her towards the window. PICARD Come, we don't have much time. VASH Are the others outside? PICARD They're waiting for us back in Sherwood. That brings Vash to a quick stop. VASH You mean you came alone? PICARD Yes, now let's... VASH What kind of plan is that? PICARD An excellent one if you'd only hurry up. But Vash refuses to budge. VASH You do realize our lives are at stake here. PICARD Only too well. VASH And this is the best strategy you could come up with? One man against an entire castle. PICARD I suppose you know of a better one. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - REV. 2/5/91 - ACT FOUR 47. 41 CONTINUED: (3) VASH How about this? You go. I'll stay here. She walks away from the window. PICARD And do what? VASH Marry Sir Guy if I have to. PICARD (ironic) That is brilliant. VASH If there's a way to escape, I'll find it, eventually. With my head still attached. PICARD You don't really expect me to leave you here? He reaches for her. She pulls away. VASH I can take care of myself. PICARD Must you be so stubborn? Suddenly the door is flying OPEN and Sir Guy enters backed by a retinue of SOLDIERS. SIR GUY There'll be no escape for you this time, Robin Hood. PICARD (to Vash) Behind me. He steps in front of her and reaches for his sword. But Vash is quicker. She pulls the blade out of his scabbard and points it at his chest. VASH You should have left while you had the chance. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT FOUR 48. 41 CONTINUED: (5) Sir Guy advances on them, smiling. SIR GUY Well done, my dear. VASH (sweetly) Consider it my wedding present to you. The Guards lead Picard away. 42 EXT. COURTYARD - NIGHT Picard and the Guards come down the stairs. He barely glances at a beaming Q as he's hurried away. Sir Guy follows behind. Q Congratulations, Gisbourne. I see you've snared the jackal. SIR GUY It's Marian who deserves the credit. Took him with his own sword. On Q's astonished REACTION... 43 INT. MAID MARIAN'S CHAMBER - NIGHT Vash is seated at a table, writing feverishly. Her SERVANT ENTERS and scuttles across the room to her. SERVANT You sent for me, M'Lady? VASH You must take this letter to Robin's men. SERVANT You want me to go to Sherwood Forest? At this time of night? VASH You'll leave immediately. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT FOUR 49. 43 CONTINUED: SERVANT (glancing out the window) But it's dark. I'll get lost. Vash continues to write. SERVANT Besides, it's not safe. What with all them hedge robbers and worse lurking about. VASH Please, this is urgent. SERVANT You ask me, you'd be better off staying with Sir Guy. He's got a future. Why you'll be living in London before you know it. VASH But you must go. Otherwise, they're going to kill him. She's about to offer the folded letter to the Servant, when the door SWINGS open. Vash leaps up dropping the letter on the table as Q ENTERS. VASH How dare you come barging in here this way! Q I come to offer apologies for my harsh words earlier. I had no idea you were so ruthless. The cold blooded way you betrayed Robin was most impressive. Q is now standing right by the table. Vash forces herself not to glance down at the letter. VASH That's most gracious of you. Q I admit I was surprised... (a beat) Though perhaps not as surprised as Jean-Luc. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT FOUR 50. 43 CONTINUED: (2) Now it's Vash's turn to be surprised. VASH You're Q. Q (bowing) And you are a very interesting woman. He notices the letter. Q What's this? She tries to snatch it away. VASH Give me that. But it's too late. Q A letter to Riker? (reading) Quick... Come to Castle... Must save Captain... (cheerfully) Why this is wonderful. Such marvelous duplicity. You certainly fooled Sir Guy. And me as well. (a shrewd glance at Vash) I do believe you're worth further study. VASH (turning on the charm) Am I? Q Unfortunately, we won't have the time. (shouting) Guards! They enter. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT FOUR 51. 43 CONTINUED: (3) Q Take this traitor away. (to Vash) It appears there's going to be a double execution. Vash is marched from the room. And as Q gloats over this latest turn of events: FADE OUT. END OF ACT FOUR STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 52. ACT FIVE FADE IN: 44 EXT. COURTYARD - THE NEXT DAY A CROWD has gathered to SEE the show. Sir Guy and Q sit together at a dais at one end of the courtyard. 45 NEW ANGLE the stairs leading to the tower. We HEAR VOICES coming down off-camera, drawing close. PICARD (V.O.) My fault? VASH (V.O.) Yes, your fault. PICARD (V.O.) We'd have been safe in Sherwood if you hadn't grabbed my sword. Picard and Vash, both wearing shackles, come into VIEW as they walk toward CAMERA... VASH I grabbed it to prevent you from being killed. PICARD You should have never interfered. VASH You were the one interfering. PICARD I was trying to rescue you. VASH Next time don't bother. PICARD I won't. They come to a halt in front of the executioners block. Q steps forward to meet them. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 53. 45 CONTINUED: Q Don't you two ever stop arguing? No response. Q Tell me Picard, as you stand here facing the termination of your insect existence, do you see what has led you to this end? (beat, no reply) Was she worth it? PICARD Can we just get this over with. VASH (hurt) Are you implying I'm not worth it? But Picard keeps his eyes fixed on Q. PICARD Your game was for my benefit, Q. She is innocent in all this. Q She is many things, none of them innocent. PICARD Let her go. VASH Jean-Luc, you do care. Q A gallant gesture Picard. But a futile one. (a beat) Farewell. I hope you'll both be happy together. He moves aside as Sir Guy rises to his feet. SIR GUY (to Picard & Vash) You have been found guilty of outlawry and high treason. Do you have anything to say before sentencing is carried out? STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT FIVE 53A. 45 CONTINUED: (2) Impassive stares from the prisoners. SIR GUY Ready them for the block. The Guards remove the chains. 45AA NEW ANGLE A group of hooded monks have entered the courtyard. Beneath the hoods are Riker, Worf, Geordi, Data, Beverly and Troi. 45A ANGLE - PICARD AND VASH already kneeling at the block. 45B ANGLE - THE MONKS (OPTICAL) taking in the scene in front of them. Worf reaches for the sword beneath his robe. Geordi lays a restraining hand on Worf's arm. GEORDI Too many of them. We'd never get to the Captain... RIKER Data, we need a diversion. Now. Data opens his left arm, revealing the circuitry and blinking lights within. He pulls out three small components and fastens them together. DATA (to Riker) Please stand back, Commander. Microfusion cells can be somewhat dangerous under high temperatures... Riker stands back. Data tosses the components into the Tinker's fire. The fire FLARES briefly, then there is a small explosion and a dramatic pyrotechnic discharge which startles the Executioner and the onlookers. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 54. 45B CONTINUED: Amidst the confusion that follows, Picard leaps to his feet and rams his elbow into the executioner's stomach, knocking him to the ground. Picard then grabs hold of one of his guards, and pulls his sword free of its scabbard. 45C OMITTED 45D NEW ANGLE Riker, Worf, Geordi, Troi, Beverly and Data (who has closed the panel on his arm) throw off their monk's robes. VOICES It's the outlaws. Robin's band. Sir Guy unsheathes his sword. SIR GUY Guards. Take Marian to the tower. Vash whirls and punches one of her captors but two others drag her up the stairs. Picard SEES Vash being taken away and tries to follow. A guard tries to block him and is cut down. 46 NEW ANGLE As our crew beats back the attacking soldiers. 46A DATA holds out his arm and "clotheslines" one soldier as he charges by. Then Data looks up at... 46B ANOTHER SOLDIER who lunges toward him with a sword. The man stops in mid-thrust, shocked, as... Data catches the tip of the blade between his thumb and forefinger... and slowly CURLS it back. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 54A. 47 NEW ANGLE Q watches the battle that rages around him with delight. 48 NEW ANGLE Picard comes face to face with Sir Guy. SIR GUY I'll have you know I'm the greatest swordsman in all of Nottingham. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 55. 48 CONTINUED: A quick flurry of cuts and parries as they test each others skill. PICARD That's very impressive. They engage again. PICARD But there's something you should know. A furious series of strikes ending with their swords crossed at the hilt, their faces inches apart. SIR GUY And what would that be? PICARD I'm not from Nottingham. He pushes Sir Guy away. 49 NEW ANGLE Gradually Picard forces Sir Guy up the stairs leading to Marian's room. Sir Guy, panic building, takes a vicious cut at Picard's head. Picard ducks, thrusts upward, and stabs Sir Guy through the body. Sir Guy tumbles off the staircase. 50 INT. MARIAN'S CHAMBER (OPTICAL) Vash, listens to the SOUNDS of battle. Suddenly, the door SWINGS and Picard races in. VASH Jean-Luc. She runs into his arms. Picard is fed up with all this, tosses the sword to the floor. PICARD (shouting) It's over, Q. Now get us out of here. Q APPEARS in the room. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT FIVE 55A. 50 CONTINUED: Q (applauding) My compliments, Captain. I doubt Robin Hood himself could have done better. PICARD If any of my people are hurt... Q Sadly, they're all fine... but the point is they could have been killed, and you might have been too... all for the "Love Of A Maid." My debt to you is paid, Picard, if you have learned how weak and vulnerable you really are... if you can finally see how "Love" brought out the worst in you... VASH Nonsense. You're absolutely wrong. It brought out the best in him. (to him, intimately) His nobility, courage, self-sacrifice. His tenderness. Q (to Vash) You're good. Very good. PICARD (end of his patience) Enough of this. Q Indeed. He snaps his finger and Picard DISAPPEARS. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/7/91 - ACT FIVE 56. 51 OMITTED 52 INT. MEETING ROOM (OPTICAL) The room is empty. Picard, in uniform, suddenly APPEARS at the podium. Riker and the others APPEAR back in the audience, exactly where they were sitting before. All back in their Starfleet uniforms. They look around in confusion. RIKER Everybody here? TROI Where's Vash? Picard scans the room. No sign of her. PICARD Computer, locate Council Member Vash. COMPUTER (VOICE) Council Member Vash is not aboard the Enterprise. Off his look of concern... 52A EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL) still in orbit. 53 INT. READY ROOM (OPTICAL) Picard ENTERS. As the doors CLOSE behind him Vash MATERIALIZES. VASH Hello, Jean-Luc. PICARD (smiling) Well, this is a relief. I was afraid that Q... VASH There were a few things he wanted to discuss with me. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 56A. 53 CONTINUED: PICARD I'm surprised he wasn't too busy gloating over his victory. VASH (beat) He was right about one thing, Jean-Luc. As ridiculous as it was, his game did prove how much you care. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 57. 53 CONTINUED: (2) PICARD I may not share my feelings with my crew, but I do have them. A warm moment passes between them. VASH I'm going to miss you, Picard. PICARD I wouldn't be surprised if our paths cross again. VASH I'll see to it. They kiss. PICARD So, where are you off to now? VASH I haven't made up my mind. STAR TREK: "Qpid" - REV. 2/6/91 - ACT FIVE 58. 54 CONTINUED: VASH Remind you of someone you know? PICARD (amused in spite of himself) As a matter of fact... yes. Q (to Vash) We are going to have fun. I'll take you places no human could ever hope to see. VASH (to Picard) Who can resist an offer like that? Picard sees there's no way to change her mind. He advances on Q. PICARD As payment in full for your debt to me, you will guarantee her safety... Q She will not be harmed, Jean-Luc. I promise you that. Picard looks over at Vash. A silent farewell. Q Well, aren't you going to kiss her good-bye? Picard and Vash stare at him until he gets the hint. Q Oh, all right. He VANISHES. Vash smiles at Picard. VASH Well aren't you? A final kiss. Then Vash steps back. VASH Goodbye, Jean-Luc. She VANISHES. STAR TREK: "Q Love" - 1/31/91 - ACT FIVE 59. 55 C.U. PICARD A beat. Then a trace of a smile appears on his face. 56 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL) turning towards the unknown. FADE OUT. END OF ACT FIVE THE END